I’d like to share the first two chapter of my book with you. I plan on picking out chapters from my book that I believe will peak your interest. Happy reading!
Chapter 1 (Short Introduction)
The year is 1955. I was born in Bratislava, in what was formerly Czechoslovakia, to a single divorced Jewish mother and, to me, an unknown father.
My wonderful Grandfather, Eugen “Jacque” Singer, and Grandmother Ernestina Singer, nee Müller, had four children: a son, Hugo, and three daughters, Olga, Katka “Kitty,” and Lucy. My mother, Lucy Singer Kohn Scott, was the only one with a daughter, and single, because she was now divorced. I had two older male cousins, Kitty’s son Peter, and Hugo’s son Tommy.
My grandfather, who was born on May 31, 1888 in Vienna, about 60 kilometers from Bratislava and which was once the Austrian Hungarian monarchy capital, was the most wonderful and only decent masculine symbol I had in my life. Henry Kissinger looked like the exact replica of my grandfather. My grandmother was the typical warm but very opinionated and intrigue-happy woman. She was the boss and the matriarch of the family. My grandmother was born in 1892 in Hungary, but spoke fluent German, as did my grandfather, my mother and myself. My mother had attended German schools. I had attended Slovak schools; after World War II, Czechoslovakia became a part of the post-war Warsaw Pact of communistic countries, so Slovak and Russian were the predominant languages in schools.
From the preface:
If I Only Knew . . . . Four words to describe the premise of life! Life’s twists, turns, and navigation through bumpy roads could be avoided if only we knew that . . . .
My autobiography covers the story of my Jewish mother (born in Slovakia, July 4, 1920), who served in the British military, and unbeknown to her, was used by the British to work as a spy. If my mother only knew . . . . Would she have made different choices? If my mother only knew that escaping the Nazi regime and serving time in the military in Egypt would save her from subsequent years of oppression under the communist regime—would she have made the ill-fated decision to return to Slovakia post-World War II? If my mother only knew that the note left under her door could lead her to a bridge that was blown up minutes later, would she have followed the path her lover tried to lead her on? If my mother only knew that the decisions she made would affect my life and bring upon me abuse, incest, betrayal of love and country, would she have made the same decisions?
As a thirteen-year-old girl, I made the decision to escape the newly Russian-occupied Slovakia to the country I thought would be my saving grace—Israel. My mother allowed me to leave Slovakia at such a young age, by myself, because of fears that the repetition of the Nazi regime may ensue. Instead, the Jewish state that was supposed to protect me ended up being one of the biggest betrayals of my life (one of many). If I only knew that getting on the plane that fateful day would lead me to experience a different kind of holocaust, a personal one, would I have gotten on that plane?
If I only knew that my choice in husbands would land me in an insane asylum, cause me to attempt to leave this world, contact the FBI to protect my life, use an assumed name, and ultimately, inflict so much pain on my daughter, would I have married these men?
If I Only Knew is the story of three generations, all female, all Jewish, spanning over three continents. From the late 1800s to present-day 2012, my life’s story will take you through an emotional journey by way of a time capsule of some sort.
In short, I believe in destiny. I believe that the travails we experience are purposeful. I believe that we are exactly where we are today, because it is what is meant to be. So, despite it all, the answer to the proverbial question of if I only knew, would I? Yes, I would do it exactly as I have! Mistakes, pain, and all. It is all happenstance. Part of our journey through life. It is what you do with these life lessons that matter.
I hope that my life’s story will give you inspiration. I hope my tribulations will serve as a means to show you to live life with purpose, to live in the moment, and to hold those you love dearly close to your hearts. Learn from your mistakes, don’t repeat them. Trust that from everything bad, something good will come out of it. It has, time and time again, for me.
Had it not been for my abusive mobster of an ex-husband (one of a few), who wanted me locked up in an insane asylum, had me falsely arrested, caused me to attempt to leave this planet, and ultimately drove me to feel such disdain for the Jewish state of Israel—I would not have my daughter today. My daughter and I share such an incredible bond. She is my best friend. My confidant. I would not trade any of those experiences if it meant not being able to experience this very meaningful relationship with my Bella.
Had it not been for me marrying my last husband, having to now use an assumed name, and get protection from the FBI (this story spans over eighteen years), my daughter would have not found her true passion in life. This story is still ongoing. It is full of heartache. Full of real life threats that render my daughter emotionally paralyzed at times. However, if you ask Bella today, would she trade it, or would I have still married this man, if I only knew? The answer is no, she would not trade this experience, and yes, I would have married this man! For we have faith that this, too, is part of our destiny. That something greater and better will come out of this.
Good always prevails over evil. This I know!